Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Imparting Some of my (Limited) Wisdom - If I knew then what I know now!

Another year is coming to a close and as I start to catch up to all the senior citizens down in Florida by getting OLDER  I've had some time to ponder my own mortality. Although I’ll probably figure out a way to live forever eventually, it does seem that the days of walking around shirtless and getting hit on by young hotties are way behind me.

Actually I was confusing myself with Mark Wahlberg in the movie Boogie Nights. I don’t think I ever walked around shirtless. Only assholes do that, But the point is there are so many things I know now that I wish I knew then.  I’ll do a great list of those at the end of this entry. Also there are so many things you guys should be doing to age better and longer that you aren't doing , but you should! Once you hit 40 go to your next high school reunion and look around. Do you see that guy over there who looks like your dad? He’s YOUR age. Do you want to look like that? Me neither. You need to start taking care of yourself.

This guy is only 42 and he's saying, "Don't be like me!"

Our ability to bounce back after a night of partying or even staying up late has diminished if not completely gone away. When I go out and party my ass off these days I need to make sure I have the next 2 days off to recover. It’s almost not worth it any more.

I discovered this guy a long time ago who is a Harvard Doctor. He’s done extensive research on what causes us to age and has a very in depth web site devoted to anti-aging. He started me on the trail of researching into what happens to us when we age and how to combat it. I’ll put up links at at the end. For years now I have been taking various vitamins and supplements on a daily basis and I can honestly say that I don’t feel my age at all. It has worked for me beyond measure. I’m going to give a partial list of some of the things I take every day and put up a link to this guys site where he lists a ton more. He calls them “Anti-aging Firewalls” and explains exactly what the science is behind it. He cites references and sources and isn't trying to sell anything. He is a legitimate researcher.

Anyone can look like me. (simulated me above)

Getting old sucks. Everyone knows that. However there are many perks that come along with not being a young punk any more. Years of experience can make most of us the smartest people in the room, while the younger, more impetuous ones are still stumbling and falling on their faces all the time. 

One of the main paths to being one of those people I think, is to learn from our mistakes. Sure, we've all fallen on our faces but the smart ones figure out why it happened and make damn sure not to do the same dumb things twice. So many people immobilize themselves because of their fear to fail at something. It is so stupid! The more chances we take, the more things we try, the more successes we will have! The more we will move ahead in life. This isn't brain surgery folks. 
Try. Fail. Learn. Try again. Win.    That is one of the secrets of life.

I hate people who are set in their ways. We all know someone like this. They always do the same things the same ways. They never want to try anything new. They are always afraid of getting hurt or not liking something. So boring. I know I shouldn't judge. The world needs librarians but come on! I just can’t relate. Don’t be that guy. There’s too much out there. Imagine all the things you might try and love if you broadened your horizons. I know if you are reading this then I am more than likely preaching to the choir right now.

Let's get healthy:

Vitamin and Nutrient List:

This changes depending on what I feel like taking but there’s a few things on this list every human should be taking to be healthier and extend their life. Don't take my word for it. Take Google’s.(look shit up)

Resveratrol    . Take as much as you can afford every day!

COQ10           Another one you should all be taking.

Link:                   http://www.prohealth.com/library/showarticle.cfm?libid=18472

Green Tea       I am a coffee drinker. I don't drink tea. I take these in pill form and the more the better.

Omega 3 Fish Oil    Whether in Krill form or whatever. It is good for you and you need to be    
                                  taking it.

Dr. OZ knows -               http://www.doctoroz.com/videos/daily-dose-omega-3

Astragalus Root       This stuff is very important. Everyone should be taking it!

Link                               http://www.doctoroz.com/videos/astragalus-root-right-you

BUT WAIT THERE’S MORE!            

Ginseng, Glucosamine Chondroitin, B-Complex, Calcium, Magnesium, Zinc, Vitamin E, Garlic pills, L-Arginine, L-Carnitine,   Probiotic 10, Curcumin, B-12, Ginko Biloba, Lycopene, DHEA

You also should be eating lots of Olive Oil, Coconut Oil, Walnuts, Raw Almonds and less of

Butter, Sugar, Eliminate Coke completely it’s poison, Less Red Meat (not all are you crazy?)

Here is a link that if you have time to read will explain how everything works and why it’s so important. There is a science behind how we age and it is a fact that we can slow it down and look and feel better.

Much shorter and to the point list of what the Doctor considers his

I’m sure there are those who like to play Devil’s Advocate and will debate on their getting shitfaced five days a week/cigarette/no sleep diet and how it works for them.

GREAT.  If you are living it to the fullest and your boat floats then good for you. This has absolutely worked for me. I’m riding my bike and unloading my truck, and climbing mountains and skiing and working my ass off and not getting tired. I don’t have a bad back and have no use for any little blue pills. I’m younger despite my age. It works. That’s why I’m sharing it today on my 65th birthday! yeah right. If I was really 65 you guys would be on your way to CVS or the Vitamin Shop right now!

Also, at the risk of sounding way too helpful. I mentioned above a list of things that I wish I knew then that I know now.

Of course most of you know this stuff already but many of my friends are divorced, sick, unhappy and generally pissed off about life. Hey it happens, but Maybe we can help the next person.

1. Learn how to Listen

Isn’t it amazing how few of us can do this? I have learned so much by just watching and listening. Especially in business, what every Poker player knows is that you can see what the other person is really thinking just by watching what they say and seeing what they really mean. Look at someones face and see their expression. Watch the body language. See if they are looking you in the eyes. HEAR what they are really telling you. Then you can react appropriately.

On the other side of the coin, if you’re in a relationship with someone who never listens to you it probably is doomed. Selfish people can’t focus on anyone but themselves. Selfish people don’t listen.

2. Put yourself Last

Speaking of selfish people, so many relationships end because one or both parties are just completely unwilling or unable to let someone else have their way. Marriages that last, do so because people learn to put themselves last and LIKE doing it. It can be a pleasure to make someone else happy. Once you have kids you have no choice. They come first. You learn this that first night they scream for 12 hours when you’d rather be sleeping. Changing diapers at 3am preps you for life with kids but staying married and being successful in many other areas is dependant on your ability to not be selfish!  Once you start taking care of others you’ll find that you become the go to guy. People will depend on you. They will call you when they need someone they can count on. You’ll have a better marriage. You’ll have better relationships with your friends and guess what else? When the chips are down and you need someone -
THEY WILL ALL BE THERE FOR YOU?   See?  It’s a two way street.

3. Manage your Money

This is a tough one. I’m still learning this but hopefully someone young will read this and listen.  START SAVING NOW!

If I could go back in time and talk to myself one of the first things I would say, after I gave myself a list of ways I would hurt myself physically and how to avoid the pain,

is to put half of every paycheck away in a money market, savings, growth fund or even in a pillow case but start saving. Live beneath your means. You don’t have to drink 5 days a week! You don’t have to go out to eat every night! You don’t need the most expensive stuff. Learn how to cook! Learn ways to save!

for example. Let’s say you buy your groceries at Stop and Shop or Shaws OR maybe you’re a real idiot and you go to Trader Joes or Whole Foods. Start shopping at Market basket and it’s like getting a raise. Start going to Price Rite and it’s like winning the lottery! HOLY CRAP! It’s true.
If you don’t shop around you won’t know. Constantly look for ways to do things cheaper and smarter!

Buy a used car. Get it checked out and don’t buy a piece of crap but avoid a car payment. Maybe put the car payment in a bank account every month instead. Buy generic stuff like toilet paper at Dollar Tree. Cut corners. Educate yourself and SAVE. You will be old and rich some day. Believe it. Then when you’re around 60 buy a nice place in the Florida keys, eat Lobster and drink Bourbon until you die. You win.

4. Speaking of Money

Some of the biggest assholes I know are always trying to keep up with the Joneses. Who has the nicest car? Who lives in the biggest house? What do YOU do for a living? Have you eaten at the most expensive restaurants? Do you have the nicest clothes, the best watch? handbag?

He who dies with the most toys wins? Really? That’s so 80’s. It’s so false.

Money does not bring happiness. Look at all the rich and famous junkies, alcoholics and suicides! They were rich. Why are they so unhappy? Maybe it’s because you paint a pile of shit gold and it’s still going to stink? amirite?  You have to like yourself. You have to be liked by others. Have a little humility. Fly under the radar. It’s better that everyone thinks you’re doing ok. Even if you’re buried in cash! Why make people jealous? What are you showing off for?  You’re making people HATE you! 

  Money doesn't buy happiness. It can make things easier sometimes that’s for sure.

I learned a while back that sitting on a beautiful beach makes me feel better than having a nice car. Cooking a delicious meal for my family makes me happier than eating at the Palm.
Skiing down a mountain and breathing the cold clean air at the top of the mountain is better than buying a Rolex and showing it off to a bunch of people. Do things for yourself! You aren't impressing anyone with your "Stuff".  

Quiet time alone with my wife (ok sex) is better than pretty much any fancy car. Playing with my kids and their friends? The BEST!

Work on THOSE things. Not owning things. “Things” come and go and believe me SO does money. If your life is built on a foundation of money and things then guess what happens when you lose those things?

(end of part one - life lessons) To be continued...

SO that’s my 2 cents for today. Yes it wasn’t a story about homeless guys pooping in front of me or how much I hate someone or another. But these are the many layers of CappyinBoston.

and I do have many hate stories left in me so stay tuned.

wow so much positivity today. I need to go kick my cat.