PEOPLE I HATE - Pt. 2

George Carlin knew

I had a friend call me the other day. I know...right? He didn't text me, email me or FB instant message me! It's like a miracle when someone actually tries to communicate by SPEAKING to me! It almost never happens any more. So I did what anyone would do under the circumstances. I stared at my cell phone until it stopped ringing then texted him back. "What do you want?"

It turned out one of my good friends had been reading this blog. He wanted to know when I'd be doing People I Hate pt. 2. I called him and we spoke for a few minutes. "I don't hate anyone really and I am trying to have a positive attitude." I said. He couldn't relate. "Everyone knows you have a crappy attitude. Just write it down. Trust me you'll feel better."

Maybe he has a point. This time of year always pisses me off. New England fall always lasts around ten minutes then it's cold and we are getting beaten over the head with the holidays. Halloween isn't done for two seconds and I have to start buying people presents? I just had my long johns on for the first time yesterday. 11/9/2014. That's early. That's not cool. So yes I am pretty sick of everyone. The weather only makes it worse. People seems to get worse this time of year too. The entitled, rude, ignorant sheer stupidness seems to come out full force.

I'm not as cynical as I come off. I want to like everybody and actually I do like many people. I used to think everyone deep down is good and can be reasoned with. All you really need are good communicative skills, a sense of humor and a bright disarming smile. That is all you really need to make friends and allies wherever you go.

Then you can ride your unicorn off into the sunset and pick daisies in the land of Oz while naked bodybuilders make love to you next to an ocean of melted chocolate.....

Yup. That is what I USED to think. I don't really believe that any more. Some people are completely unreasonable. Some are entitled fools who believe the world is actually revolving around them and some people are just batshit crazy.

You can not reason with those types. You will never be able to trust them. Obviously you can't depend on them or consider them friends but actually they might be enemies.

Today's edition of People I Hate is going to be focused on crazy people. Let me explain. I am not writing about the mentally ill padded cell types although some of these people in today's post could easily benefit from years of therapy. More or less I want to touch upon the kind of person who can not be reasoned with. Maybe you can relate.
Maybe you're one of them...Hopefully not.

I. The Narcissist

There's selfish and then there's SELFISH. Everyone knows a Narcissist. You may not realize it so let me lay it all out for you.

1. Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a personality disorder in which a person is excessively preoccupied with personal adequacy, power, prestige and vanity, mentally unable to see the destructive damage they are causing to themselves and to others in the process.

Now that sounds pretty cut and dry but it isn't as easy to spot one as you might think. So ask your self these questions:

• Do you know someone who has no problem whatsoever blowing you off?
• Does that person constantly break their word and then somehow make is seem as if it's your fault that they screwed you over?
• Is everything always about them? Is their Ego so big that any time they get insulted they hold a grudge for like FOREVER?
• Are they in and out of romantic relationships because the other person is always somehow crazy or too demanding?
• Do they more or less suck but still make you laugh and can be charming when they want to be or more likely want something from you?

If you answered yes to these questions there is really only one thing to do.   RUN!!!

I heard Judge Judy say once that you can't fix stupid. It's the same with a Narcissist. You're never going to fix that person. They will always be that way. It's better to cut and run. Get far away and move on and if you are stuck working for a person like this well......good luck. 

II. The OCD Person

I used to have a friend who would love to go out to dinner. He was always raving about the newest place or some dish he heard about. He would get a group of us together and we would all go out. The thing that would drive me crazy was that he could never just order off the menu. 

Do you know anyone like that? I've known this person for over twenty years and have to this day never seen him just pick an item on the menu and order it. He always has to ask for changes. Can the chef make him a special side dish? Can they cook it differently just for him? Is it possible to put it on an extra large plate? (seriously) It's embarrassing and incredibly annoying. I came to realize that he just couldn't help it. I just couldn't help getting pissed off. I always say the same thing to him. "No matter what they do for you man it's always going to come back tasting like spit." But at least he'll have his saliva HIS way right?

I know this other guy who hates to be driven around. He needs to be the driver wherever he goes. Great. I love to be driven around but here's the thing. He has this ritual that he needs to do before we can leave. 

He checks the rear view mirror.

He fixes his seat belt

He turns on the heat or AC.

He checks the side mirrors.

He fixes the rear view mirror

He unbuckles his seat belt and puts it back on again.

He checks the side mirrors

He lowers the heat or AC

He checks all the mirrors.     (am I annoying you yet?)

Yes it can go on for ten minutes or more. He's normal as far as I can tell in every single other circumstance. But if I attempt to get him not to do this long insane ritual then we can't leave. It would be funny if it wasn't me that has to wait for this. One time I forced him to just start the car and go. We had to pull over ten minutes later because he said the mirror was messed up. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?" I would ask. He didn't really have an answer. I wondered what he would do if he came across a car with no mirrors, just a steering wheel and that was it. His head would explode.

You guys must have people in your life that do completely irrational things that drive you nuts. It isn't clinical enough to get them help. It's just bad enough to be annoying. We all know people who hoard. But are they hoarders? Maybe not. Maybe they are just doing it on purpose just to piss you off! Naah. You should just learn to be more patient like me.
(yeah right)

  

III. Mr. or Mrs. Instant Best Friend:


There is this acquaintance of mine who always has to hug me when she sees me. She LOVES me. She speaks to me as if we have been best friends for life. She asks about my family, my wife, my health. This is not a big deal if not for the act that we are complete strangers more or less. We hung out twice at a big event. That was it. Now she and I are best friends apparently. Nothing makes me more uncomfortable than when a person who is sort of a friend says "Bye! I LOVE you!" Come on. You don't love me. It took me years to say that to the woman I married. Now I'm supposed to say it back to a girl I know from a Blogger party? " I passionately love you too! I'm totally comfortable with this! BYE!!!"  ugh ugh ugh.

Some people are like that. I am pretty friendly and I like to make new friends but there's a little imaginary line that once crossed makes you a fruitcake. Some people touch a little too much. I have this imaginary box around me. YOU don't get to enter that box unless I invite you in. Okay? Some people just barge right into that imaginary box.  They move in with luggage. Then they are too close. They are breathing on you. They are touching you. Once they leave you can still smell them and they better smell good because now you smell like them. Thy have left pieces of themselves in your PRIVATE BOX! WTF!  They are all over you. God, I hate that!

Not cool. Not Cool at all.

I know a guy like this who is always asking for favors. "Can you do me a quick favor?" 

"Cappy, can I get your friends number that (Insert job here) so he can hook me up with some free service?"

"Would you mind helping me move?"  

 HAHAHAHAHA! That's always a good one. If some "acquaintance" ever asks you to help them move that's where you spell it out for them like I did for this guy.

He needed an intervention so I gave him one.

"Look bud." I said calmly. "You and I aren't brothers are we?"  

"No" He said, "Why do you ask?"

"Because my brother wouldn't ask me to help him move because he knows I'd say no."

I then went on to explain that manual labor is expensive and that if someone was going to do an expensive, time consuming task for someone else for FREE then it could be considered a "FAVOR" and that favors of this magnitude should be reserved for people who you have known for a LONG time or who you are extremely close or intimate with.

"Are we close and intimate?" I asked him. 

"NO"  he said.

"So do you think I am going to take an entire day off from work and from being with my family to help you do some back breaking work for free?" I said.

"NO" he said.

and he was 100% right. We don't really talk much any more.

Cynical Face

SO. these are a few more types who just crawl up my keister and give me Agita.

The list really is endless.  Next time when we do People I Hate pt. 3 we can do a whole post on the passive aggressive people who deserve special recognition for things like Yelp reviews and asking questions with no answers. Venting like this really does help keep me positive though.

Positive I am not leaving the house today.

The Ultimate Guide to the Largest Seafood Expo in North America!

Yes Please!

Some of my earliest memories are of my dad bringing home lobsters to eat and letting my brother and I play with them on the kitchen floor before putting them in the pot. We would name them and be very sad when dad took them away to cook. Of course my dad was a born and bred Bostonian which meant that he knew how to cook a lobster and how to make a kick ass lobster roll ,so the mourning period for our friends the lobsters would last right up until the first bite.

When you live in New England you really can't help but have an affinity for the ocean and everything edible that comes out of it. I am no different and with me it is even more so than most. I have been around the ocean in some way or another my whole life. I dive, so being underwater with the denizens of the deep is a special thing to me. Seeing these creatures in their natural habitat is something I think everyone should experience whether snorkeling or even just by spending a day at the Aquarium. 

The Seafood Expo North America comes to Boston once a year and is literally the largest trade event on the continent! Nearly 20,000 businesses in the seafood industry are all under one giant roof and the opportunities are endless to not only learn a little bit about where all the seafood comes from that we love to eat but also 

to EAT it. 

The fact is that 99% of the time when I sit down for dollar oysters at some local raw bar or I decide to shoot a dozen  Cherry Stones over at Row 34, I'm not thinking about where they came from. I'm a business man. I work for a living. I'm not a "Foodie" or a "Chowhound" (whatever that is) 

But what I have learned at this amazing event is that if our fish and shellfish are not sustainable then we can and will run out. The fish stocks have to be maintained throughout the world. Luckily this industry is doing a great deal to make sure we never run out. 

From Nat Geo:

Sustainable fishing guarantees there will be populations of ocean and freshwater wildlife for the future. Aquatic environments are home to countless species of fish and invertebrates, most of which are consumed as food. (Others are harvested for economic reasons, such as oysters that produce pearls used in jewelry.) Seafood is respected all over the world, in many diverse cultures, as an important source of protein and healthy fats. For thousands of years, people have fished to feed families and local communities. 

But the fact is that if you want to learn about things like sustainability, protecting our oceans and fisheries, seeing where the seafood comes from (all over the world) and see how it is brought out of the oceans to our plates then you HAVE to get yourself here next year. Me? I'm just a novice. I am a scuba diving, boat riding, swimming, water gun toting regular type guy and walking around aisle after aisle eating smoked salmon, crab cakes, shrimp, oysters, all manner of sushi and more is  why I come to the Seafood Expo.                                                                            

                                            

My own experience is somewhat unique at the Seafood Expo. I always go with a plan. You should be aware that people from all over the world are coming here to conduct business. Many people are restaurant and store owners looking to buy machinery and seafood for their businesses. However, many are also here to eat, sample and learn about the industry. I am here primarily to eat. (surprise!) I come to go to the food show next door for business.  With the price of a ticket you gain entry to the Seafood show as well which is awesome for me.

POINT - It is crowded. Give yourself time. There are all types of cultures here and all types of people are all there to sample the delicious seafood. There will be lines. There will be people who think they don't need to wait on lines. Be patient. There is enough for everyone. 

Giant Clams

 Here are 10 Tips on how to do

 the Seafood Expo North America:

1. Start all the way on the left side. Many people are going to the New England Food Show first then heading in to the Seafood Expo. Big mistake. Do you want to fill up on bread? You will be full way before you eat your first oyster.  But if you get there early and start as far away from the food show side as possible you will have a lot of food all to yourself. No lines.

2. Know what you like. I love sushi. I love Oysters. I love it all really but I know that if someone offers me a huge cup of faux crab salad I am not eating that. Your stomach has a finite amount of room in it. You will get full if you eat everything. There is simply too much to sample everything and it is definitely not all good stuff. 

TUNA!

3. Don't just run through stuffing your face. This is a huge opportunity to not only learn about where the fish come from but also to meet local purveyors. Sure there are people from Morocco and Korea mixed in with Chinese and Mexican fisheries and people from everywhere there is fish  but I find that the local guys have some great stories. They have some seriously fresh oysters, salmon and more. They are here in town or near by and can tell you where to eat their products locally.

Will show muscles for mussels.

4. I said don't run through stuffing your FACE! Did you see that ugly monster-like monkfish? Taste it! You never had eel before? It is so good! Try it! Things like wolf fish, whelks and seaweed salad aren't on every corner. Broaden your horizons! Try new things.

Wolf Fish

Do not fear the Monkfish!

5. There are also a lot of fried foods. There is fried calamari and I even had fried gator once here but go easy on the fried stuff. It will fill you up really fast and usually you won't really get to taste the fish. IMHO. 

6. Oysters. There are a lot of oysters here. They are all different. Taste them all. Duxbury and Wellfleet are different from PEI. Learn about them.  They all taste differently. They are good for you. If you are not from Boston, please take a moment and discover the cherry stone. (It's a clam)

Sammy the Salmon

7. Salmon. Big business is that fish. There are Chinook, Sockeye, Coho and more. There are farm raised and wild. They can be smoked a million different ways. I had a smoked maple candied salmon that was out of this world.  They are cooked a million different ways. You can learn recipes. You can learn why salmon should be on your menu at home and when you go out. Eat a lot of salmon here. Trust me.

8. Sushi and Sashimi. There are many Asian companies here at the Expo. Get in there and eat! They are not all created equal. Smell first. Watch out for things that are still frozen. I almost lost a tooth on a frozen shrimp. You can have a sushi extravaganza here at the Expo. Go for it! 

9. There are classes. The Master class series had Chef's teaching how to cook lobster dishes. Chef Dan Enos from Oceanaire did a class on salmon. Go hear a session. Watch the shucking competition. I actually had a brief lesson on shucking so I can do my own oysters.

Shell -less Lobster!

10. Spread the word. Do you know people in this industry? They should be here every year. Take pictures. Blog about it. Facebook the heck out of it. This Expo is a gem and sharing it with others is just as important as all the rest. Also it is three days so come at least twice. It is hard to do in all one day. Your stomach can only fit so much.I speak from experience. Oh and one more thing. The exhibitors are people too. Be gracious! They are feeding you after all. Please and thank you's go a long way and if something tastes great then let them know Compliments can lead to even more delicious seafood! 

Boston is one of the greatest cities in the world and luckily for you if you are going to the Expo at the Boston Convention and Exposition Center then you are centrally located to everything. You can walk, take a cab or the silver line to anywhere in Boston Proper. Right near by is Fort Point or as some call it, the Innovation District. This area is in mid-gentrification mode lucky for you. Here's a brief list of some of my favorites. It is where you can walk to if you are staying here for the Expo. 

Row 34 - They call themselves a workingman's oyster bar. Go for the seafood. Raw bar is outstanding. Beer menu is top notch and it is a short walk from the Convention Center.

Row 34's web site

Tavern Road -  I love this place. The DiBiccari brothers run this great place. Unique Inventive food menu AND bar menu. The bar actually rocks. Mixologists live here so drink. The food is also outstanding.

Tavern Road's web site

Trillium Brewery - Yes it is a brewery right near by but the beer is so good you have to go. You go into the small space and go left to the bar where they will let you sample whatever is currently being offered and they have a lot of different brews. I love the Pot and Kettle personally. It's a dark porter and it is really a craft beer. They sell by the bottle, 32 oz and gigantic Growler. You buy and leave to drink it elsewhere like your hotel room or home.   So good!

Trillium's web site

Going the other direction North towards the waterfront there is also a myriad of dining options. Here are a few I like.

Temezcal - Upscale Mexican

Jery Remy's - sports bar

Legal Seafoods and Legal Test Kitchen - seafood!

the No Name - on the fish pier - Old School seafood

Not a free sample!

There's actually about 20 more places within a few minutes walk of there but you can't go wrong with those and by all means Yelp the heck out of the area. Boston is FULL of great places to eat. A little research goes a long way.

Seafood Expo North America 2014

NFI Interviews at the show

World Wildlife Fund info on Sustainable Fishing

Most Importantly:

Enjoy Boston, Have fun. Tell your friends and associates. See you next year!

Leave comments below.